29 July 2008

On Marriage...

Many have been dreaming and wishing of getting married. They would like to embark on a journey, a journey which two different persons have to go together for the rest of their lives. The road ahead is very uncertain, and surely couples will encounter a lot of challenges in their married life, but they are quite certain that the bond of love for one another which they have sealed on their wedding day will somehow enable them to make it through. Let me just give you three words of advice which if diligently followed, I believe, would help you a lot in making marriage a success.


The first word is SHARE. To establish a lifetime partnership of love together is what marriage is all about. Marriage is a covenant before God and before men and only death could dissolve this marital bond.
A lifetime partnership of love together could be very intimidating, especially if you do not learn how to share everything with one another. You have taken steps towards sharing with one another, moments of joy and sadness, a sharing of your likes and dislikes, the more intimate sharing of your whole person. Sharing leads to communion, to a fuller union with one another. Sharing entails that you share with one another every single thing, without any reservation, especially the sharing of your feelings. Take some few moments of quality time everyday, to share with one another what happened during your day. Sharing, then, means keeping your lines of communication open. So many relationships have been destroyed just because couples stopped sharing their feelings and the core of their beings with one another.


The second word of advice is the word CARE. Whatever it is that you want to do, whether alone or together; you should try hard to do it with care and concern for one another. Your love for one another will grow stronger everyday if you nourish it with little things that show how much you care. Even in sharing of your hard and painful feelings for one another, try to do it with tender and loving care. When you start sharing your feelings without care, you would no longer be sharing, but nagging; you would no longer be communicating, but imposing. A lot of couples who apparently are still sharing a life together, but they have already stopped caring for one another long time ago. They still stay together, but only "for the sake of the kids." They are then merely sharing a house, but not a home, and that is because they no longer share with care.


The third word is: BE FAIR. Even if you share everything with one another, and even if you deeply care for one another, but if you are not fair with one another, then still your marriage will lack adequate fulfillment. Being fair means lending out a helping hand and allowing the other to grow and develop as a person. Being fair means acceptance of the other and readiness to forgive because in the years ahead of you, you will slowly come to realize that after all you have not married the perfect husband or the perfect wife, but a human person with his or her own share of faults and shortcomings but always open and willing to change for the better.


So, try to always remember these. SHARE, CARE AND FAIR. If you do this, you can be sure that you will be able to face the many challenges that you will encounter in your married life. May you be faithful to the duties and responsibilities of your married life, to be able to bear the trials and tribulations of life, and to be able to fulfill with joy the plan of God for you. Always remember that in every Christian marriage there is always a third party involved: God. In your married life, therefore make space for God, and He will not leave you alone.


Wisdom from my boss.

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